[Message Sent]
Had a dream last night. A dark dream J. I've had nights where I've dreamed up the last fight I was in, or the look on a fella's face when I take him out in less than five punches, but nothing like this...
I was killing people J. Left and right killing people. And it was like I wanted to keep doing it. I... I've never wanted to kill anyone. Hell, until I got drawn into this mess I never had. Something in this dream kept urging me to do it though, and then there was this voice. Someone praising me for what I'd done.
Dammit J. As shitty as it was I couldn't help but like being encouraged like that. You used to do that for me. Now? Now I got no one to tell me when I've done right by them. This woman in the dream did though... but I couldn't get over all the blood and death piled below me.
I felt like someone, or something, was painting pictures of what is, or could be. Like one of those old fairy tales... and I guess in a way, I've been kind of riding high on adrenaline out here. I'm not itching for a fight. Am I? I just fight what's put in front of me. That's how I've always been... I mean, I don't go looking to push around the small fries. I don't want to be someone that does that. I just wanna knock the assholes down a few pegs.
Things were so much simpler back on Nar Shaddaa. Kind of wish I could come home and just forget all this. I get the feeling I can't. And I get the feeling there are bigger choices to be made. I'm scared I'm gonna make the wrong ones J...
Gonna go do some training. See maybe if Val Issa has anything to say on all this.
Had a dream last night. A dark dream J. I've had nights where I've dreamed up the last fight I was in, or the look on a fella's face when I take him out in less than five punches, but nothing like this...
I was killing people J. Left and right killing people. And it was like I wanted to keep doing it. I... I've never wanted to kill anyone. Hell, until I got drawn into this mess I never had. Something in this dream kept urging me to do it though, and then there was this voice. Someone praising me for what I'd done.
Dammit J. As shitty as it was I couldn't help but like being encouraged like that. You used to do that for me. Now? Now I got no one to tell me when I've done right by them. This woman in the dream did though... but I couldn't get over all the blood and death piled below me.
I felt like someone, or something, was painting pictures of what is, or could be. Like one of those old fairy tales... and I guess in a way, I've been kind of riding high on adrenaline out here. I'm not itching for a fight. Am I? I just fight what's put in front of me. That's how I've always been... I mean, I don't go looking to push around the small fries. I don't want to be someone that does that. I just wanna knock the assholes down a few pegs.
Things were so much simpler back on Nar Shaddaa. Kind of wish I could come home and just forget all this. I get the feeling I can't. And I get the feeling there are bigger choices to be made. I'm scared I'm gonna make the wrong ones J...
Gonna go do some training. See maybe if Val Issa has anything to say on all this.